Here is Bug in a cute dress that her Great Aunt Mel sent her before Christmas. The bottom is shaped sort of like the Irish dancers' dresses. It is a nice dress for winter--what an idea, a dress with long sleeves!! Who would have thought??! Do you know how long and how many places I have looked for a Christmas/winter dress with long sleeves??? Thanks Aunt Mel!!
Anyway, we are all still sick here. DH and I are dealing with nasty head colds, mine is more of a sinus thing. Some days my face aches so much. Ouch!! Bug still has a nasty cold, and random fevers. Our little piglet isn't eating normally either. That is a first.
I really don't have much to say....we haven't been doing anything except coughing, sneezing, and going through Kleenex the past 3-4 days...when is this cold going to end?? I am pretty sure we have emptied about 4 boxes of Kleenex. Our poor noses. I am going to have to get out my lysol wipes and be a crazy woman when we are done with this.
I will leave you with some pretty pictures of our most recent 6 inch snowfall (two days ago)....yeah, it was pretty alright...PRETTY HEAVY AND PRETTY WET. Ask DH, he was the one out shoveling, and snow blowing it!!
Monday, December 31, 2007
Here is Bug in a cute dress that her Great Aunt Mel sent her before Christmas. The bottom is shaped sort of like the Irish dancers' dresses. It is a nice dress for winter--what an idea, a dress with long sleeves!! Who would have thought??! Do you know how long and how many places I have looked for a Christmas/winter dress with long sleeves??? Thanks Aunt Mel!!
Posted by Amy at 1:18 PM
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Well, Christmas was an adventure this year. We started at DH's family, then went through a nasty blizzard, spent a night at a hotel, then onto my family. On the way home (from visiting my family) on Christmas Day, Bug screamed half of the way home (about 2hrs--last time she did this she had a nasty ear infection...). Now, as it stands we are on day two of diarrhea, and a nasty cold. You can tell in this picture, she doesn't look extremely happy. Through all this crazy travelling and sickness, we still took an extra day and had our celebration of Jesus' birth. It was so fun to just see the wonder and joy in our daughter's eyes. It is a constant reminder of the miracle she is. We are so grateful.
Santa brought Mommy a heated mattress pad...that I will be trying out for the first time in about 15 minutes...Ahhhhhh--Who needs DH for a heat source when you have that! Santa brought Daddy an autographed baseball--Geoff Jenkins. Pretty cool. I guess Santa thought it would be funny to get Mommy the game Perquacky...I hate that game. Santa knows I hate that game, yet, Merry Christmas Mommy! I guess I was on the naughty list this year. I would rather have a raging cold than play that game. Looks like I will get to do both! (hmmmmm, autographed baseball vs Perquacky..) Thanks Santa. Bug is officially a Elmo Freak...She loves her Elmo's! Thanks Grandma Kris, Uncle Dan and Uncle Matt and Aunt Kim!
Bug has started a gross habit--picking the lint from between her toes after we take her socks off. Lovely. Because our little angel is such a good girl, she will actually pick the lint and go put it in the garbage. At least she throws it out, right??? I keep remembering, if this is the worst, she will be just fine! I have learned to just let the minor things go, and in a couple of days she won't be doing it anymore. Geez, I hope that works with this, otherwise there will be alot of teasing in her future!!
Posted by Amy at 9:46 PM
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Ellen update: I got an email with my prize form, that I signed, scanned and emailed back to them. My friend Tess (from the Ellen show) said that they are on "hiatus" from the show starting Friday. They are going to send me the information on how to book my Vegas hotel, how to get my $400 massager from Brookstone, my fancy-schmancy $70 candles and my $300 skin/hair care package. Hello, EBAY!!
For crying out loud...Who needs a candle that costs that much??? I am certainly the last person that needs such a fancy candle. I am going to ebay this stuff, and then all the "donations" can to to our adoption fund. Lord knows we will need all we can get. As far as the Vegas hotel is concerned, I may have come into some generous plane tickets, by a very generous person (you know who you are...). We will see where that goes...
Just a note--Condolences to the family of my old bank President, Marty. He passed away from a long battle with cancer. He was one of the most fun, humble, great guys you will ever meet. For sure the best boss I have ever had. He taught me a few lessons along the way, and in such constructive ways. Never harsh words, even when you know you screwed up. Heaven gained a real gem on Monday night. Rest in Peace, Marty.
As we are getting closer to celebrating the birth of Jesus, we want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas, and may God bless you and yours.
Posted by Amy at 2:09 PM
Friday, December 14, 2007
I got a awesome call tonight. I had been out shopping when (I guess) my cell phone rang. Because I was on a mission to get what I needed to get and get the heck out of the stores, I must have not heard the phone ring. Anyway, I got home and my cell phone beeped to let me know a message was waiting. I checked the message, and this is what it said.."This is Mark calling from the Ellen Degeneres Show, calling to let you know you have won Day 6 of the 12 Days of Giveaways sweepstakes.." He then proceeded to give me instructions on how to get my prizes. Prize value is over $1400!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Among the prizes--Two nights at the Red Rock Luxury Resort in Las Vegas (including a massage at their spa)! Check out the website to see my name on the winners list and see what else I won!!
So, I got this call at 8pm--it is now almost 11pm, and I am still so excited I can't go to sleep! Of course, DH is sound asleep. He never gets too excited about anything. This is crazy--I still can't believe I won this...ya see, I have never won anything...I mean ANYTHING in my life--well, except the cabbage patch doll when I was in 3rd grade. Anyway, that is my news for today.
Tomorrow, DH is planning on being to the stores at 7am to shop for me and Bug for Christmas. The only other thing we will be doing this weekend is baking some cookies and relaxing....and of course I will be planning what to do in Vegas next year!!! Thanks Ellen!!!
Posted by Amy at 10:41 PM
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Here is a cute picture of our sassy little Bug...she loves listening to music through Mommy or Daddy's earbuds...
I think that is all for now...Bug woke up too early from her nap. Sounds like it will be a nice afternoon....
Posted by Amy at 1:54 PM
Thursday, December 6, 2007
This is what we woke up to this morning....Ummm, this is what I call a "get in your sweats, get my coffee, get ready to play with the same toys you play with everyday (Bug) cause' we are not leaving the house" day. Fine by me. No sense in going out in that if you don't have to right??? As Ellen says...Am I right Ladies??
I love watching Ellen (most days), and Bug loves to bust a groove with Ellen each day. Bug loves to dance. Each day I happen to be watching Ellen, I try to catch Bug dancing when Ellen does her intro, so I can email the clip in. Every so often Ellen will show clips of little ones dancing to her show. It is hilarious! One of these days, Bug will get her 5 seconds of fame!!
Adoption update: We met with Bethany Christian Services (BCS from now on because it is too much to type!) yesterday morning. We are for sure going to use them as our agency. We are very excited and happy to finally find our agency that will be able to bring us together with our next child. We can't wait. We also now have the mound of paperwork to get started on. We have to have it done in 30 days, which sounds like a long time, but if you saw the amount of paperwork, you would think otherwise. This, folks, is exactly why all of my Christmas stuff is done. I love to plan ahead---much less stress.
This morning I woke with a nasty headache. Before I could take my happy advil pills, I needed to eat, and before that I needed to throw some laundry in. While sorting laundry, I could see Bug out of the corner of my eye, being very quiet, and very still. Why, I wondered...bear in mind, my brain was pulsing because of this headache, and maybe subconsciously didn't want to know what she had gotten into. But I turn around and this is what I see--
Bug had emptied the salt shaker onto our bedroom floor. I know this is nothing compared with what she will probably be into by next year, but the morning had just started, and I felt like my head was going to explode. The salt piles (and vacuuming at 8am) didn't help things...
I have a prayer request: Please pray for little Anna G. Her parents are good friends of ours. They just found out she has to have open heart surgery. Pray for guidance for the doctors, and strength for Anna and her family. Thanks to everyone...
Posted by Amy at 1:48 PM
Monday, December 3, 2007
Here is Bug watching her first snowstorm, that dropped about 5-6 inches of snow, covered with ice. That was a fun time. We pretty much didn't leave the house the entire weekend.
We made our reservations for our trip to Florida. We are so excited to get to some warm weather (Daddy), swimming (Bug) and DISNEYWORLD(Mommy)!!! We will be staying with Rob's grandparents for half the time, and we will also be visiting some friends of ours that recently moved to Tampa.
Bug's "Uncle" Dave and "Aunt" Jen (good friends of ours) came over yesterday. We exchanged Christmas gifts, as we didn't know if we would see them again before Christmas. .. This is what she got:
She does LOVE her new Cabbage Patch Newborn. The baby's name is Katelynn Tracy. I guess Bug decided to name the baby after her Aunt Tracy!! It is so cute, though, and just the right size for Bug. She takes Katelynn everywhere!! Thanks Dave and Jen!!
Another bit of of good news...I got a call this morning from the billing office of my IVF doctor. The recent IVF is finally settled with the insurance company. In the past DH's insurance (through his employer) never paid anything related to infertility. Today we received a bit of an early Christmas gift....news of a future refund check. Let's just say it would pay for a couple of family vacations to Florida. It's not going to though, it will get turned right around and go to the adoption agency. It was just such a surprise, because when we did the IVF we "knew" that the money was going to be gone, regardless of the results. I guess his insurance was feeling generous the day they paid my claims...
Posted by Amy at 1:23 PM
Friday, November 30, 2007
I am officially ready for spring! It is nasty cold, and it won't be getting any better. We are on schedule for a nasty winter storm, including rain, sleet and snow. Lovely. I am glad we did our grocery shopping tonight! Another interesting note--I had to replace my zipper on my winter coat, so I won't get it back till Monday. :-)
Adoption update: Not much to update. Our scheduled Thursday meeting got cancelled due to the flu--not with us, with the social worker in charge of domestic adoptions. She actually called from home, to tell us the flu had hit her house. I could hear her kids in the background. So, Monday we will reschedule, hopefully for sometime next week.
This nasty winter storm is yet another reason I strive to be done shopping by December 1st. I am officially done, by the way. I just am waiting for some last minute online orders to come, then I will do the rest of the wrapping. What a relief. :-)
Bug did a weird thing today. She is a huge Elmo/Sesame Street fan. This afternoon, well after Sesame Street was over, we were playing with her little Elmo doll, and I started singing the Elmo's World song. Do you know what she did?!?! Out came the bottom lip, and she got tears in her eyes!! She was trying not to cry, you know how kids do. She then proceeded to go to the top of the stairs and "look" for Elmo (our TV is downstairs). It was sort of cute, but then I felt bad, because she was genuinely sad (I am assuming because she couldn't see the "real" Elmo). Daddy would say..."Toughen up!!"
Posted by Amy at 10:16 PM
Monday, November 26, 2007
Well, we made it through two family visits, three turkey/mashed potatoes/rolls/cassaroles/fruit salads/yummy pie meals, and nasty traffic during our four hour ride home. Bug was actually squealing with joy, when she got to play for a couple of hours after we got home last night.
We enjoyed visiting both families. We missed Uncle Matt and Aunt Kim, as they were visiting Grandma and Grandpa in Florida. We missed Uncle Michael, and cousin Erin, as they were sick with the flu, and we didn't want to risk getting 103 degree fevers, and raging headaches. No Thanks! We got to see Uncle John and Aunt MJ, who we haven't seen for awhile. We also got to see Uncle Mike and his new puppy. We also stayed at my best friend's house, although we didn't get to see them at all, as they were visiting their family.
My DH has a new addiction--Family History. He has recently found out he is distantly related to Alec Baldwin and the Wright Brothers. There is nothing wrong with being related to the Wright Brothers, however, I wouldn't let too many people know about the link to the Baldwin brothers. I can think of many other famous people that I would rather be related to, than the Baldwin brothers!!
Today, I am starting to put up Christmas decorations. I know...it's still November, but I am excited for this Christmas. It will be so much more fun with Bug this year! She gets so excited when she sees Christmas trees, lights or decorations. We can't wait! I am also working on laundry today from our long weekend. Last night, I threw a load of jeans in and got them in the dryer before I went to bed. This morning, I was separating the rest of the laundry, and unloaded the dryer (load of jeans from last night). I promptly started the washer, dumped the detergent, and grabbed the closest basket of "dirty" laundry...yes, you guessed it--the jeans load I had just pulled out of the dryer!! I didn't realize this was the same load of jeans until it was too late. I wonder just how many brain cells I have?? Ughhhhhh.
Posted by Amy at 1:20 PM
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Well, we are heading out for Thanksgiving to our families' houses. We are looking forward to some time to catch up with family, and of course EAT!! I will try not to gain 10 pounds between two Thanksgiving meals.
Adoption Update: We have another meeting with Bethany (Christian Services) in a week to discuss more details, and hopefully go ahead with the formal application. Getting the home study started will be the next step.
Gratitude consists of being more aware of what you have, than what you don’t. What are you thankful for?
Posted by Amy at 8:28 PM
Monday, November 19, 2007
Yesterday, we bundled up and went to the Christmas Parade (yes, believe it or not is was actually called the "Christmas" parade). It lasted almost two hours!! Bug loved it!! She just stared at all the floats with the Christmas lights. Just to see the amazement in her eyes, and seeing her get excited was enough to make me cry. The best part was when Bug saw "Elmo" walking in the parade. She started yelling, and got sooo excited. It was so fun (and cold, too!!).
I am currently finishing up wrapping Christmas gifts (and birthday gifts for Daddy's side--Seems like everyone has a birthday in December or January!!). Please don't hate me, I just like to be organized, and absolutely despise going out in a blizzard to find that last minute gift, because I waited too long, and it is December 23rd. I refuse to be that person. I don't deal well with crazy shoppers either. I don't have patience for these people who run the shopping isles to grab the latest "I can wet my pants" Elmo (or is it "I can go potty" Elmo--I don't know). Hey, at least I admit my faults!! Enough of that...
DH spent Saturday afternoon installing a water softener at our house (it was the original one that came with the house, we just hadn't ever used it). I have to say, I grew up on hard water (although not as hard as it is here at home), and generally don't like soft water (because it makes you feel "slimy"), but it is pretty nice. I actually like it. No water stains on the dishes, and you save detergent!! Sometimes I surprise myself.
How come when your child is in pain, 30 seconds feels like 10 minutes??? I put Bug down for a nap, and she just started to cry (the "I'm in pain" cry--you other mothers out there, you know what I mean). I went up, just knowing that something was wrong. I peeked in, and she had her leg stuck in between the bars of her crib. Her leg wasn't' "just stuck", it was stuck almost up to her hip joint! I seriously thought I was going to have to call 911 and have them cut her out. I managed to get her out (without butter, oleo, or margarine!), although for that 2 minutes it took, I was starting to freak. I am sure this is minor compared to what we have to look forward to....
Posted by Amy at 1:01 PM
Friday, November 16, 2007
Here is a picture of Bug playing with some "dough". It is so much different from play-doh. This stuff is homemade, non-toxic (of course), scented, tastes bitter (so the kids don't eat it), "crumble-free" and is sooooo fun!! This was a good buy I got at a craft fair about a month ago. It is actually called Double D Dough...(Can you believe that Grammy?)
Adoption update: We had an informational meeting on Wednesday, with a local agency, Bethany Christian Services. They are a nationwide agency, they just happen to have a local office. We are 98% sure we will be using them as our agency. We will be meeting one-on-one with a social worker at the agency probably sometime in the next week or so. The total cost is more expensive than the other agency we were looking at, but Bethany includes the legal fees, and cost of training and classes that we have to go through to become "paper ready" for placement. The majority of birthmother matches Bethany makes are all in-state too, so that aleviates cost for travel. So, that is where we are at now. More updates to follow, as we get them.
Daddy is going to clean up a highway tomorrow with some fellow employees, for a couple of hours. Not us, we will be warm and cozy in our nice warm house. Daddy hates being cold, so I was surprised to find out he VOLUNTEERED to do this, but whatever.
Bug has been starting to say quite a few words recently. She has said "cracker", "computer" and "da-ba deeeeee". We have no idea what this means, nor will we probably ever know. You just smile and nod....
Posted by Amy at 8:45 PM
Monday, November 12, 2007
Well, our long road trip to PA went off without a hitch. Bug was the best little traveller I know. On the way out, she cried a total of about 10 minutes, and on the way home about 15 minutes total. Not bad for a very active 16 month old!! The only time Daddy was crabby is when Mommy whipped out the laptop, and we watched a DVD called "Elmo goes Potty". It was about 45 minutes too long! I thought it was better than listening to Bug cry, while we were stuck in traffic. Daddy said "for the love of God, can we please listen to her cry???" Adoption update: We have one last meeting with a local agency on Wednesday night. After that, we will make our decision, and get the home study going. We are so excited to get going so our birth mother can find us! I don't have much to blog about, because when we visit PA, we tend to not do much except visit with family, eat, and eat. Great-Grandma loved to see all of us, and we had such a good time. We had a four-generation picture taken, and it turned out very nice. The only thing I did was find some excellent deals on Halloween costumes at the Disney Store at the local mall. They were only $8. Dumbo for next year, and Lady (Lady and the Tramp) for 09'. Can't beat that. Both come with foot and hand covers. They are very cute...
Posted by Amy at 1:27 PM
Friday, November 2, 2007
Well, Bug had her first official Halloween. She was a giraffe, and she loved it!!! (she hated putting the costume on, but once it was on she was ready to go!)While waiting for the Trick or Treating hours to start, she proceeded to pull out every single tootsie pop sucker out of the bowl, and lick the stick of each sucker. Lovely. (it was keeping her happy while I made dinner, so I didn't care! Kids don't care--they just want candy!) We took her to visit two neighbors and she had a blast. I took her to one, and as soon as she got out on the sidewalk and saw what looked like hundreds of kids, she started running and screaming (happy screams!). It was the funniest thing ever!! Daddy took her to the other neighbor, then she played in the leaves in the front yard for a few minutes (still in her costume!). Her one piece of candy got lost in the leaves (and was found today when I went out to get the mail). When we got home from visiting the neighbors, she ran in the house and took a ride on Charlie (her horsey--get it? Charlie Horse?? That nickname was courtesy of Daddy!), thus the picture.
Adoption update: We had our consultation with an adoption lawyer. We are happy to say, we feel much more educated in this entire process. We also have determined we will be using this lawyer, and are extremely happy to check that off our list! It is amazing how much more relaxed we feel just knowing we have the lawyer part taken care of. Now, the next thing we are going to do is have a meeting with another local agency. Our lawyer works closely with this agency, and right now they have a shortage of adoptive parents. She strongly suggested at least looking into this agency. Ironically, I had just scheduled an informational meeting with this agency yesterday. We have that appointment set up for November 14th. We are going to hold off with signing with the other agency until we talk to this local one. Our lawyer said it will save a decent amount of money, time, stress, etc, if you could find a birth mother in the same state in which you live. You wouldn't have to deal with another lawyer, another states' laws, and the travelling (the list could go on). So, for now, we are going to take a breather from reading constantly about adoption, and relax.
Other than that, not much else is going on here. We are heading out on a road trip, so there may not be an update for awhile. There's nothing like being in a car for 11+ hours with a toddler that doesn't like to sit for long. I am going to get some new toys (and possibly some tranquilizers) to make this trip more tolerable!!! :-) Just kidding of course about the tranquilizers...it will be quite interesting, though.
Posted by Amy at 9:11 PM
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Posted by Amy at 2:11 PM
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
This is a perfect example of what a toddler can do in 30 seconds. Sorry, Daddy.
That is all I have for today. Bug is still sleeping. She is going on hour number 12. You don't have to ask me how happy I am about that!!! I didn't hear a peep from her all night (maybe that's because I was so wiped out, and slept through any crying she might have done!!!). I guess the antibiotics are helping her. I will update more tomorrow after our meetings with the agencies.
Posted by Amy at 8:26 AM
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Ok, I was going to upload some pictures from our eventful weekend, but the blogger-picture-uploading-thingy isn't working properly. I will add those on tomorrow.
No more updates on the adoption road yet, we just have our two appointments on Wednesday with two different agencies.
We did our combined visiting trip this weekend. We visited DH's family first, then my family. My Aunt Mel (who is from the D.C area) happened to be in town speaking at the Nurse's Association, so I was able to visit her, and listen to her speech. It was hilarious. The visit with the in-laws went lovely, then we were on the road to visit my family. Because my Aunt Mel and Uncle Gary were heading there too (they were going to stay at my grandma's house), we were planning on staying at a friends house. Well, my friend called me to let me know that we were still welcome to stay, but that she was just at urgent care, and has strep. NO THANK-YOU. So, we arrive at Great-Grandma's house, and I start calling around to see what hotels have a room available. We are cheap, so we opt for the $44 a night place, and decide to stay till Monday. Fine.
We get to the hotel, and the wallpaper in the bathroom is peeled about 6-7 inches from the wall. I don't want to even think about the nasty germs that are in that room. (I am sure we have all seen the "48 Hours" where they take the "bluelight" to the bedspread, doorknob, etc, and show you what kind of germs are there...)Bug is officially not allowed anywhere in that room, except in her pack-n-play!!! It worked out though, as we were only there to sleep, and shower. As planned, Sunday morning my mom, sister, myself, and Aunt Mel head to the big annual craft fair at the university. That was a good time. I actually got quite a bit of Christmas shopping done. Fast forward to Monday morning. DH is in the shower, I am packing up the hotel room. Bug is on the bed "reading" some books. I turn my back for maybe 40 seconds, until I realize she has been quiet for way too long. I turn around, and she has Daddy's glasses in two (almost three) pieces (I will post a picture of that later). One bow was completely twisted around to the opposite side, she popped the lens out, and broke the little plastic "wire" that runs along the bottom of the lens, that holds it in the frame. Yikes. I gently broke the news to Daddy, who wasn't very happy with Mommy.
And we are off to Great-Grandma's house for breakfast. As always, it was loud and crazy, but by now Bug was more than happy to join in, with what we call her "church" voice! We headed home after lunch, and Bug was napping before we even hit the highway. We were so excited. That lasted about 40 minutes. Bug decided she would scream for the remaining 3hrs and 20 minutes of the trip. It was such a joy. Needless to say, I was ready for a drink when we finally got home.
By the time we were home, her nose was running, and she was congested. At 11pm, I am sitting on the floor in the bathroom with her, and running the hot shower, to try to steam the mucus out of her lungs. She was up the entire night. She threw up twice, once in my hand (hey, at least it didn't hit the floor!!). This morning, I took her to the doctor (which she absolutely LOVES), and she has an ear infection and a sinus infection. LOVELY. A nice beginning to the week....I am going to go take a nap.
Posted by Amy at 12:37 PM
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
For those who know me real well have probably heard me talk about a little girl from our church who got her angel wings at the age of 13. She went to heaven in July of 2005, succumbing from brain cancer. Her name was Laura. I never had the privilege of meeting her, but still think of her almost daily. I have always wanted to tell her parents how much of an inspiration she was to me, but is there ever a good time, when you loose a child in such a horrible way? Fast forward to yesterday...
A friend of mine was having surgery at our local hospital. Before I left home, I realized my shirt was spattered with leftover lunch Bug decided she wanted me to taste. On a whim, I grabbed a t-shirt. It happened to be a t-shirt that I purchased at a concert fundraiser for Laura a little over a month before she died. (To this day, if I am having a bad day, and feel like I need more strength, I wear this t-shirt.) On the back of the t-shirt were quotes from this little girl who, I am pretty sure, had more faith than most of us. In trying to find my friend's hospital room, I pass the nurses desk. I was reminded that Laura's Mom worked at the local hospital, and thought the woman at the desk looked familiar. Later, during our visit with my friend, in walks Laura's Mom. We small-talked, but I decided at that time, that when I leave I will make sure to let her know how Laura changed and inspired me.
After our visit was over (Bug was running around crazily), I stopped out there and talked to Laura's Mom. I explained how much we have struggled with trying to build our family, and how much Laura gave me hope and inspiration. I struggled to not cry, but it was such a good feeling to finally be able to let her know how much hope her daughter brought to me. I explained how I used to wear this t-shirt to every single procedure appointment, just to remind me of the strength this little girl had. (the IVF nurses probably thought I only owned one shirt!!) My thought was (and still is...) "If this little girl can go through all the pain of chemo, radiation, blindness, and all the other nasty things that come along with cancer, I can certainly get through this petty IVF stuff, right?" Just wearing it made me think of Laura, and the awesome strength and love for God she had. Laura's Mom was so appreciative of this and said she always loves to hear these type of stories. We were glad to finally meet. It is amazing how, even in death, Laura gives hope.
--"No problems are big enough to hate life, I love my life. If I hadn't gotten cancer and lost my sight, I wouldn't have met all these wonderful people. I can be negative or I can be positive, and I am going to choose the positive, I will make today a good day. I have prayers in my heart and an angel on my shoulder. I just let God take care of everything."--Quotes from Laura
Posted by Amy at 1:40 PM
Friday, October 12, 2007
This week was interesting. It started out with the unhappy news of a negative pregnancy test, and ended with one adoption application submitted (out of state agency), one adoption orientation scheduled (local) and another one in the works (local). It is exciting, yet overwhelming. It is amazing how much goes into the adoption process. I am sure we are just seeing the tip of the iceberg, too!!
Posted by Amy at 8:43 PM
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Here is a picture of Bug with Grammy and Grandpa, taken this past Saturday. It was nice to have them both here (and Andrew too!!).
We are beginning the looooonnnnngggg journey of adoption. I am pretty sure I haven't made it through my grieving process yet, as I get going on the adoption stuff, then have a crying spell. Going into unfamiliar territory is scary...
We have been in contact with three agencies already. Two local, and one out of state. All have domestic infant programs, and two have bi-racial/African-American programs. We have one orientation set up for the first week in November, and one that we will probably set up for next week. We are on the road....I just hope and pray, that we have minimal bumps.
Posted by Amy at 12:23 PM
Monday, October 8, 2007
After a month and a half of Dr appts, needle sticks, IV's, ultrasounds and lots of waiting, we are sad to say, that this cycle did not work. I am not pregnant. We are obviously very sad, and are discussing what our next step will be. The obvious step would be adoption, but a part of me is not ready to let go of the fact that I may never be pregnant again, ever. That fact is extremely hard to deal with. I know GOD has a plan, and this just must not have been in HIS plan. Easy to say, hard to swallow...
For now, we are going to keep this blog up. It may not be updated as often as it was previously, but it will still be here. We are leaning towards adoption, so we will update as things start to happen. Plus, I can still put updated pictures of Bug on here, right??
Thank-You to all our friends and family for their thoughts and prayers. Thank-You to Grandma Kris, and Grammy for taking time to come and help us while I was on bed rest. WE LOVE YOU BOTH!! Throughout this, we are remembering that we have a beautiful daughter, who we both love with all our hearts. She is such a blessing to us, and brings us constant joy. Her smile and infectious laugh is what will get me through the next couple of weeks...
Posted by Amy at 12:51 PM
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
So, here I sit with nothing more to say really...Grammy made it here this afternoon via Amtrak. I asked her to describe the trip in one word--she said "relaxing". Maybe we will try taking the Amtrak somewhere sometime...although, with a toddler, no trip is "relaxing, regardless of the mode of transportation.
Posted by Amy at 8:55 PM
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Yes, I am going nuts. I am stuck on the upper level of the house, as that is the level where everything is--bathroom, kitchen, Bug's room, and our room (DH added a TV to our room to make this time tolerable for me). I really don't have anything to say...My mom left this afternoon to head back home. It was nice to have mom here for a couple of days, not only to help with Bug, but to get some quality Mom-Daughter time. Thanks, Mom.
Grammy (DH's mom) will be arriving tomorrow and staying till Sunday. Grammy is looking forward to spending some much needed time with Bug, and we are looking forward to spending some time with Grammy. Grandpa is coming on Saturday, then they will both leave to head home on Sunday. I have a feeling that Bug will have a culture shock when all the grandparents are done visiting, and she is stuck with just plain Mom and Dad. It is such a help for us though...Thank you so much!!!
I will not bore you with anything else, because, well frankly, I have nothing. I have 6 days of waiting to go....AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Posted by Amy at 9:03 PM
Sunday, September 30, 2007
So, we had something weird happen to us the other night. Saturday, in the early hours (specifically at 1am, and 3am--this was the morning of my second embryo transfer...), we woke to an alarm going off. It took me quite awhile to first of all wake up, and then to figure out what alarm was going off. Rob woke up and went to the kitchen, and the stove timer was going off. He came back to bed, and told me he had set this timer to remind me to take my medicine (I had to be on 4 days of an antibiotic and a steroid to aid the embryos in attaching..). In my half-awake state, I rolled over and went back to sleep. At 3am, the timer went off again. WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON???? When we were getting ready to go to the hospital for the embryo transfer, we were talking about it, and DH said that he didn't set the timer to go off (he must have been in a half-asleep fog too, when he told me that in the middle of the night!) I joked saying maybe that means we are going to have twins. Hahaha. Fast forward three hours--we walked in the door from the hospital, and guess what??? The timer was going off again...it hasn't done it since. I am not going to think about what that might mean.....
Posted by Amy at 12:30 PM
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Did I already say that Valium rocks?!? I felt drunk about halfway to the Dr's office this morning. It was fun actually, I was giggling all the way into the procedure room. Then my favorite lady, Diane, did an excellent job on my IV, and had me "drinking strawberry margaritas" in a matter of minutes. Ahhhhhhh, the song "Margaritaville" was playing through my head, as I slipped into happyland.
We were hoping on getting a picture of the remaining embryos, but I assume the lab camera was not fixed/replaced yet, as we received no picture. The grades of the remaining embryos were 2"good"B's (although, one was better than the other), and the rest C's. We just had them put the two B's in. They will let the remaining C's grow another day in the lab to see if they get to the Blastocyst stage, and if they do, then they will be able to be frozen.(Blastocyst stage is the stage right before the embryo "hatches" out of it's shell, and embeds itself in the uterine lining) Generally, the chances of a grade C embryo making it to "Blast" stage is slim to none. What they will do is check them again tomorrow, and give us a call with the results. With each of the past 3 IVF cycles we have done, the grade C embryos we had left all arrested (died) on the 6th day.
So, here I lay with 5 embryo's hanging out in my plush uterus!! If any of them attach and decide to hang on, it will be tomorrow or Monday. Needless to say, I am only getting out of bed to pee. That is it. I have to give them the best chance possible. Now the real LOOOOONNNNNNGGG wait starts. We will find out a week from this Monday. That is about all for now...I have 3 movies to watch, 2 magazines to read, and two crossword puzzles to do (and a partridge in a pear tree!!!). Enough rambling...
Posted by Amy at 12:19 PM
Thursday, September 27, 2007
So, here I am blogging from our laptop on bed rest. The embryo transfer went very well today. Man, does Valium help!! The anesthesiologist was awesome too. She kept talking about my cabana boy that was bringing me double daiquiri's!! She only had to try twice to get an IV in today. Much better. The results regarding the embryos are as follows: 2-A's, 4-B's, and 3-C's. If you do the math, that is 9 embryos, not eight. One embryo decided to start growing after they called on Tuesday morning, but that embryo is one of the C's, so it probably won't grow to be viable. SO, we transferred 2 A's, and 1 B. We will go in again on Saturday and transfer more, hopefully a "B" has made to "A" status...
I was slightly disappointed though, the camera in the IVF lab was broken, and they had no way to take a picture of our "embies". I will post a picture of the previous cycle (bug's cycle) embryo's just so you can see what it looks like--probably in tomorrows blog. It is pretty neat to see.
I am in no pain today, just resting. I ran to Blockbuster last night to rent some movies, and I have a good book and some crossword puzzles to work on. Nothing more right now...I will blog some more probably tomorrow or Saturday after the next transfer. Feel free to give me a call/stop over. I have a feeling I will be bored out of my mind within a few days....Please keep the prayers coming!!
Posted by Amy at 12:28 PM
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
I feel like Ryan Seacrest from American Idol...<<
17 eggs total. Of the 17 retrieved, 13 are mature enough to use (4 immature-not usable). Out of 13 mature eggs, we have 8 embryos that are growing perfectly!!! :-) (2 fertilized abnormally, and 3 refused to grow past the fertilization stage).
8 embryos!!! We are so excited!! Now, we just wait till Thursday at 8am, when we find out the quality of the embryos. The embryologist will grade them just like in school--A is the best, and so on. I will have one embryo transfer on Thursday, and another one on Saturday. Technical term is Sequential Transfer. The embryologist told me on the phone, they were thinking of putting in a minimum of 5 embryos, between the two transfers. I wasn't aware that they were going to do a ST on this cycle. We have done it in the past, and it didn't work. With Bug's cycle, we did a single transfer. I just keep going back to "they must know what they are doing..."
I feel almost completely fine today. Last night, however, was not cool. I offered to make dinner, as DH has been doing everything. Everything was fine till I decided to get up from the dinner table. I think the massive amount of narcotics they gave me while I was under finally wore off. I couldn't stand up straight. I had to walk around bent at the waist at a 90 degree angle!! I took a vicoden (which did no good), and was laid up the rest of the night. Today, I feel very close to normal though. :-)
I will be on as much bed rest as possible starting Thursday. DH will be home helping Thursday and Friday. Grandma Kris is coming to help out Monday and Tuesday of next week. I haven't planned beyond that...
Thank you for all the prayers, keep em' coming!! We need all we can get!
Posted by Amy at 12:19 PM
Monday, September 24, 2007
So, today went well. I am going to hurry with this blog, as my Vicoden hasn't set in yet. Maybe by the end of the blog, you will be able to tell that it has!!! :-) First--they had problems getting an IV in. They tried twice in the underside of my wrist. I will not put in words how much that hurt, as I don't want my blog to get tagged for inappropriate language!! :-) They finally got one in my other wrist. Yikes. Anyway, mercifully, they let the Verset (sp?) run, and I was one happy woman!!! I specifically remember saying..."Oh, Yeah, Baby...", and then the little Japanese nurse started to laugh. Anyway, part of the problem with the IV's is that I was nervous, and this tends to collapse the veins. When we go back on Thursday for the embryo transfer, I am going to take 2 Valium an hour before. :-) :-)
I am surprised at how well I feel right now (could this possibly be the gamut of narcotics running through me currently?!?). I feel like I could go to the shopping mall. I am still uncomfortable in my midsection due to my ovaries. Unfortunately, you don't magically feel good again once the eggs are out. Once the follicle is suctioned out, it automatically fills up with fluid. It will take a few days for my body to absorb that fluid. My hip hurts more than anything right now. This is where they gave me my IM shot while I was out. Starting tomorrow, DH will be giving me a IM shot in my hip 2x's a day. Those ones hurt, but I make sure to "ice my heiney" first, then it is usually no problem...unless of course I nagged him too much that day, and he purposely picks a place where the ice never was.
Anyway, I don't know exactly how many eggs they got today. This was the first time that they didn't tell me an exact number. What a letdown. The good news is that they said they got more than last time. :-) The real important call comes tomorrow when the embryologist calls to let us know how many embryo's we have and their quality.
Wow...I think the Vicoden is starting to work. Much harder to type now. Getting woozy....will update with the number of embryos tomorrow...Prayers for lots of good embryos, Please!!!
Posted by Amy at 2:14 PM
Sunday, September 23, 2007
So, I first have to de-bunk the fact that DH "hates" chick flicks. It took him quite a long time to publish the blog from yesterday. Why, you ask?!? Yes, folks, he was watching the movie "Music and Lyrics" with me!!! He was actually laughing more than I was. He actually enjoyed the movie because "well, there was a British guy doing pretty good one-liners...". Honey, I know it's tough to admit that once in awhile a "chick flick" is ok!!! :-)
I am officially done with belly shots. I took my last one last night. In a previous blog, I said that the "final maturation for the eggs" shot was IM. I was incorrect, mercifully. It was another belly shot that I did at 10pm last night--exactly 36 hours before the egg retrieval. The drug is actually HcG, the same hormone that appears when you are pregnant. To verify this shot "took", I have to take a pregnancy test this afternoon. It has to come out positive to prove the hormone made it to the ovaries. I also had to take a "booster shot" of stimulation medication yesterday around 4pm, just to boost the existing follicles to try to get the best possible egg quality. I am going to enjoy my "shot-free" Sunday. Luckily, they ok'ed me to take Advil for pain, if it gets too bad. This does no damage to the eggs...I made sure of that. I actually took advantage of this, and took some last night. I was surprised at how much it helped. I felt like normal for about 2 hours.
Tonight, starting at 5pm, I am on a liquid diet. Lovely. I have plenty of pulp-free juice, jello, and broth to get me through. I will be eating a nice dinner about 4:45!! My suggestion was omelets!! HaHa.. I can't have water or food for 8 hours before my surgery. (Yes, I will be getting up at 1:45am, and having a jello and some juice!!)
The exciting part about is tomorrow is that we will finally be able to know how many eggs we actually have. The number, in the past, has been around 12. Not all of these will be able to be used. They may be immature, or possibly over-mature. Please pray for us...the nerve-wracking period is officially beginning.
This picture is of Bug "reading" a magazine (that just happens to be called "Conceive"--yes it was a freebie at the Dr office!!) She loves looking at magazines and glossy ads! She will hold them up and stare at them like she is actually reading. It is the funniest thing...
Well, I am pretty sure that is enough rambling for today...I will update sometime tomorrow.
Posted by Amy at 10:08 AM
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Hello--it's DH today!
Although she is suffering from "medication-induced" swelling of the ovaries, DW (dear wife) is still well enough to sit down at the computer and type an update for today; however, she is currently watching a movie starring Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore. Since I have no overwhelming desire to watch it myself, I am going to have a go of this blogging thing.
DW has informed me that I must include "facts" about our IVF adventures in this blog, because that is what you, her legions of readers, crave. So, here is the factual update for today:
- It looks like we may have about the same number of mature eggs as during our last (Bug's) cycle-perhaps 6 or 7. This is definitely good news, since after two years you typically see some decline. But as I continually point out to DW, she's in her early 30s, not early 40s.
- Monday will be egg retrieval day. If history repeats itself, Thursday will be embryo transfer day.
- I will be taking some time off from work for the next few weeks to tend to Bug, so DW can concentrate on relaxing (is it possible to concentrate on relaxing?).
The picture above is an ultrasound of DW's ovaries (circled in red). They are swollen and are almost touching. Our IVF nurse said sometimes women who go through a stim cycle such as DW's have their ovaries swell to the point that they are actually touching, which she called "kissing ovaries." What a great name for a rock band!
Well, that's all for now!
Posted by Amy at 12:40 PM
Friday, September 21, 2007
Ok...I am SO glad the eggs are going to be out soon. I can't deal with the emotional side of this...(neither can DH!!) We were in for another ultrasound/blood draw this morning. Nurse mentioned that they upped my meds because my "E2" levels weren't as high as they should have been (blood results). ((Saleen--is E2 estrogen??)) Low E2 levels, mean maybe no eggs, or not good enough eggs in the follicles. Follicle count is the same sitting at 11-12, but the sizes are what count now. I have 6 follicles that are 20-22mm in width. Yes, that is big, and YES, I am feeling it today. The size is a tad larger than I remember from the last cycle, but the nurse says these measurements are fine. Nurse did say, though, that they are hoping to see a E2 result of at least 1000 (from my blood draw for today) to be able to do the final IM shot and be able to pull my eggs. If it isn't, it would be a huge concern that there maybe aren't eggs there...
So, when we got home and this information the nurse gave us set in, I freaked out. What if my eggs aren't mature enough, and are garbage? What if there aren't any eggs? Am I too old already? I wonder what goes through DH's head when I have these "moments". He calmly told me to just wait and see what the blood results for today were, before I freak. I cried, and Bug just stared at me and came over to cuddle and give me a kiss. It is amazing how little ones just know when you are sad. She is so receptive of my emotions--sometimes more than DH!!! :-) Maybe it is a girl thing...She has done this before. If I am crying over an episode of Extreme Makeover Home Edition, she will come over to me and sit by me and suck her thumb. Us girls have to stick together, right???
So, we were getting in the van this morning to head to the Dr office, and DH mentioned he thought a "book" was in the "pocket" of the sliding door. I said, "Book?? What are you talking about??" I got in the back next to Bug (to feed her breakfast on the way to the Dr because we were running late..), and looked at the "book". The "book" turned out to be a previously frozen Lean Cuisine meal that must have fallen out of the grocery sack last time I went shopping (and took a sharp turn), and landed in this pocket on the door. When we go, we buy for the entire month (usually), so it had to be at least 3wks ago. I picked the box out, and after I realized what it was, my jaw dropped. There was mold on the outside of the box, and it was nasty. (for the record, the "pocket" on the door is rigid, and the exact same height of the box, so it hid just perfectly...) Lovely...
I just checked my voicemail box, and my levels are 1273. :-) Nurse says the Dr is very happy with the results and will harvest tomorrow, and pull the eggs on Monday. This means another ultrasound/blood tomorrow, then tomorrow night, I will have my first IM (muscular) shot. This shot does the final maturation of the eggs in preparation for retrieval. These REALLY hurt. DH does these, as they are done in my hip. IM shots will start then on Monday, and continue till I find out if I am pregnant. Sunday will be my only day, that I will be free of any shots. But, for now, I am just happy that my levels are normal for today....this makes me extremely relieved. I am going to go rest now...I will update again tomorrow after the appointment.
Posted by Amy at 12:45 PM
Thursday, September 20, 2007
This morning I awoke, feeling normal (whatever that is on stim drugs..). Within an hour, I felt horrible pain. In a couple of hours of resting flat on my back, I was better again. I was a tad concerned this morning, as my message from my nurse yesterday (we are assigned a voice mailbox to check after every appt to get updates from the Dr/nurses) was to increase my stims to 375iu's from 300iu's for the rest of the cycle. This increase would make me grow follicles/eggs much faster, thus causing more pain. With Bug's cycle, they increased me to 275iu's from 225iu's for the last two days, and I was in SO much pain, excruciating pain. MUCH, MUCH WORSE THAN GIVING BIRTH!! Because I was in so much pain, my blood pressure hit the roof. They couldn't put me under (for the egg retrieval), until my blood pressure was in check. That is what scares me about this--but so far, I am marginal, and nowhere close to the pain I felt last time, so that is a good thing.
Bug had her 15 month check-up today. I did feel well enough to go along, which was a good thing, as both of us had to hold her down so that she could get two shots. She is in the 75% for height, and only 25% for weight. She weighs about the same as she did for her 12 month check-up. She eats like a horse!!! How can she not have gained any weight?!?! I wish I knew her secret....
Posted by Amy at 3:06 PM
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Welcome, Pillow Ladies--You know who you are! Hope you enjoy the updates!!
So, here is today's ultrasound picture. Today's follicle count is 11. I have 7 on my right ovary, and 4 on my left ovary. Sizes are 13-14mm in width, except one on the left side that is 8mm in width. The one that is 8mm probably won't yield a mature egg, as it hasn't caught up with the rest. The good news--all follicles but one is the same size, which usually means more mature eggs. Nurse says I am "textbook"--exactly the same results as last cycle. That makes me feel better. The picture is of my right ovary. In the picture you can only see 5 follicles (the big circles). Just remember, you normally have only one of these a month. This picture does not do my pain justice. Not pain yet....just VERY uncomfortable and lots of pressure.
The Doc thinks my eggs will be pulled on Monday the 24th. (Happy Birthday, SIS!!) We will know much more on Friday after another ultrasound. It was weird--at the Dr this morning, I commented on how I feel so well for being so far along on the stimulation drugs. Within a couple of hours, it bothers me to bend in the middle, and with every step I take, I can feel it in my ovaries. I know it sounds weird..it is so hard to describe. It almost feels like the ovaries are heavy and hanging down--making the pulling sensation on everything below my bellybutton. OK, that is enough description for everyone!!
DH will be staying home beginning tomorrow, till sometime next week, to help with Bug. Thank goodness, because I really just need to rest at this point. That is all for now. I will update again on Friday after the next ultrasound.
Posted by Amy at 1:00 PM
Monday, September 17, 2007
Well, today I went in for my ultrasound/blood draw/IVIG infusion. Luckily, my veins were behaving, and it only took two IV's to get the infusion started. I have so much scar tissue from all the previous blood draws/infusions from the past 3 IVF cycles. The last infusion I had was when I was about 26wks pregnant with Bug--that was the worst. It took nurses an hour and a half, and 12 IV's to finally get one to stay and work. They said if that one wouldn't have worked, they would have had to go into my leg or neck! Could you imagine??
My ultrasound today showed 4 follicles on my right side, and 2 on the left side (generally, where there is a follicle, there is a egg growing inside-mature/healthy eggs will be inside a follicle between 18-20mm in width). The right side follicle sizes were between 6-8mm in width, and the left side were between 4-6mm in width. In the past, my right side always reacts better than the left, so this isn't a surprise. This is very common for different sides to react better/worse than the other.
That is the update for today. I go back on Wednesday for another ultrasound/blood draw.
Posted by Amy at 1:07 PM
Sunday, September 16, 2007
I am officially uncomfortable. I have taken two shots of the egg-producing drug, and am uncomfortable already. That should make for a long week. Basically, I feel like a huge blimp/over sized balloon at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. It makes you feel very bloated, and makes you have seriously bad (almost doubling over) gas pains. Don't worry, just the pains! Oh, I am also extremely tired. I don't quite remember the tiredness and gas pains from before, but DH says yes, I had all of the above. The good news is, the needles that I use for the egg-producing drug are even smaller than my morning shot. I NEVER feel those! Finally, a shot I don't feel!
Grammy took this picture I am including today...Grandpa and Bug are blowing kisses to everyone!
Today I got to enjoy a church service, ALL BY MYSELF! No crying, drooling dear daughter to deal with. I forgot what that is like to actually be able to listen to the sermon, and not have to deal with minor meltdowns in the middle of the Gospel. It was wonderful...I should leave her home with DH more often! So, because today is the Sabbath (and because my ovaries are in a bunch), I will do just what HE commands--I will REST.
Posted by Amy at 10:31 AM
Friday, September 14, 2007
My seat belt is on--I am officially on the IVF roller coaster!! Everything checked out at the doc's office this morning, in fact they told me I have a "nice hamburger!". Yes, folks, a good (pre-stimulated drugs) uterus looks like a big hamburger. Hey, when you go through this stuff, you have to laugh, right??? Attached is a picture...(if you thought I was joking!) Is it me, or is anyone else craving a greasy burger from McDonald's??? :-)
I start my egg-producing drug tonight. 300iu's of Gonal F daily. This dose is 75iu's more than when I was on my last cycle (Bug's cycle). This means I will probably be on the drug about a week, which will yield approximately 15 eggs. I am just guessing based off of previous cycles. So, now I am giving myself one shot in the morning (to keep the eggs from ovulating), and one shot at night (to grow the eggs).
My next visit will be on Monday, for another ultrasound and blood draw. In addition to that, I will have an infusion of IVIG. This is a drug that prevents my immune system from attacking the embryos, after they are put back in. This takes about 3 hours, and is done by IV. The only thing that sucks about it, is it makes you feel bitterly cold, and sometimes makes you throw up. I will have to do one more IVIG before I find out if I am pregnant, and that will be while I am under anesthetic during the egg retrieval.
That is all for now...I am off to enjoy the weekend.
Posted by Amy at 1:01 PM
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Bug is getting better. Her cold isn't quite as bad as it was the other day. Today was gorgeous, so we had a playdate at the zoo. It was 77 and breezy. Perfect. Just warm enough for no jacket, and breezy enough to keep the stench of the penguin poop tolerable. We spent four hours at the zoo, and Bug fell asleep in the car on the way home. She woke up as I was taking her in, and never finished her nap. ?!?! A 20 minute nap is NOT ENOUGH!!!
Posted by Amy at 7:15 PM